Monday, September 27, 2010

Go TEAM BLUE!
















I am so excited to post information on a recent American Queen appearance. It was a particularly wonderful event for me! As some may know, I grew up in a law enforcement family, and support law enforcement initiatives with my title is a responsibility I do not take lightly. Please enjoy photos of myself and Ms. American Queen, the lovely Michele Bates, at the Cops That Cook event, benefiting the Lakewood PD Explorers Program!

I encourage you also to read my most recent blog, "Slurring the Line". This week, please take my challenge to see the ways your life may reflect some of the acceptable slurs our society engages in.

Here is my challenge to you this week ... smile at a police officer, thank one, or even write a note to your local police department to let them know you appreciate that they are putting their lives on the line each and every day for you and your family. ;-)

Blessings,
JNACK

Monday, July 19, 2010

B.E.E.

As many of you know, I started a ministry several months ago. The ministry name was, "MRS" (Mothers Returning to School), and the aim was to assist mommies who wanted to go back to college! While I believe this is still on my heart, we ran into a number of obstacles that led me to realize the constituency we were working to reach was, perhaps, too narrow. I am so thankful for the education I continue to receive at Regis, where I study nonprofit management, because it has taught me that projects will continue to grow and adapt.

If not approached correctly, or with the right team, growth can feel like failure. Growth often takes its form in "scrapping the board", "starting over", or "admitting you're wrong". And, in a fast-food world where dreams are supposed to come true, we often don't take the time to realize how wonderful these bumps in the road are for our path, and how strong they are making us. I can think of the parallel to my marriage, or my relationship with Christ; the temptation is to think laterally, to assume that I must live always in the crescendo of life – when the reality is that my growth has often been born of the jagged, up-and-down, dots on a crazy chart.

And so, I rejoice as I begin to adapt to a broader need, and explore new ways to reach individuals seeking to further their education. On the 17th, I was so privileged to meet with some outstanding women in my community who sat with me and discussed growth. I am proud to announce the formation of Beautiful.Educated.Empowered., "B.E.E.". The organization will aim to serve all women seeking higher education, which will encompass mothers. Our mission statement is, "B.E.E. will assist women in preparing for college planning, enrollment, and completion – through access to information and scholarship distribution".

B.E.E. will offer three programs: college-planning seminars, college-application tutoring, and a scholarship program. I am also excited to begin spreading the word about the Queen BEE Competition, which will give women in Colorado a chance to get involved by competing to be the organization's school presenters. Fundraisers in the future will include talent shows, Avon campaigns, and benefit concerts. I prayerfully ask you to consider becoming involved with this movement. If nothing else, check out the website today and learn more about what B.E.E. is up to!

My knowledge and my skills are incredibly limited, and it is for that reason I am indebted to the work of our new Board of Directors. Please join me in giving a shout-out (from your work desk, school desk, or home office!) to: Brenda Fletcher, Belkis Clark, Yvonne Franco, Anne Yeldell, and Laurie Pierce. These women represent wise council, and will be the backbone of all that B.E.E. accomplishes. I will be serving as their executive director, and am so honored when I think about carrying out the work they will set before me.

Thank you to all who know my background and are supporting these endeavors. I thank my Savior for the opportunity to have served as a inner-city recruitment specialist in Kansas City, where I learned of the deep need to provide specific information and guidance to those seeking post-secondary education. May He bless our humble efforts to place diverse leaders in front of a diverse audience as we spread the simple message and women can succeed in college.


Wednesday, July 7, 2010

WOW!


Well, it's official! This is no longer the blog of Mrs. Colorado American Queen 2010 ... it's the blog of Mrs. AMERICAN QUEEN 2010! I was crowned at the national event, on July 3rd. What a blast! I am now looking towards a year of traveling and spreading the message of DASH - Domestic Abuse Stops Here. What an honor!


I was able to be crowned with one of my best friends, which makes the whole experience that much cooler. Michele Bates came out to Missouri and entered as a Ms. contestant and won! Way to go, Colorado! Our state now holds two of the American Queen national crowns!


Michele and I will be serving with a great gal, named Alyssa Ballman - who is our Jr. Teen American Queen for 2010. I know with all of my hearts that we are going to have an outstanding year together, with lots of memories to come!


I want to again thank Connie Wallace for introducing me to this pageant several years ago, and for founding such an outstanding program. I want also to recognize Ms. Sunjia Burks, the new national director for the American Queen program. Sunjia suffered the loss of her husband less than a year ago, and to push forward to insure that the American Queen national pageant happened this year was a feat all its own. Here's to 2011!


For booking info, you can contact me at mrsaq2010@yahoo.com! Thanks, everyone!




Wednesday, June 30, 2010

Parting With No Such Sorrow

Tomorrow morning, I am off on an adventure. One hubby, one mommy, and one two and half year-old; set to drive a few states over! There are so many things I am looking forward to. Particularly, as this is officially my "Mrs. Colorado American Queen Blog", I must share with you that I feel honored to participate in the 2010 national crowning ceremony for the award-winning American Queen Pageant.

I have held a wonderful affinity for this system, since my first involvement in 2004 (I believe) as a judge for a regional preliminary. That year I made it into fifteen seconds of an MTV clip, whose cameras were rolling for a special that featured the event! I came back the following year, so glad for the chance to reunite with Connie Wallace, the founder, to chat and learn. And now, here I am, corresponding with the new national director as a contestant and heading out to be part of something that represents, for me, such positive involvement in pageantry. Thank you, thank you, thank you – to those who have paved the road that has lead to this opportunity.

More joyous than a reunion with a pageant family, however, is the reunion I will be sharing with my real family. And I do not stop with my brother, Grandma and Grandpa, my uncle Mark, and my cousins, Lisa and Kelly. I have been richly blessed to find time in this vacation to meet with Raeann Thompson, Jeni Jeppesen, and Gail Brickell. What a beautiful and diverse family I share when I think fondly of my sisters in Christ and the moments I have shared with them over the years. Gail and I worked together at CTU, and have grown to share pictures of daughters, stories of husbands, and tales of finding faith. Jeni and I share some of my most treasured memories … from sunning on the beaches of Florida, to crying together in a barrowed bathtub, to the kindness she showed me as I fell before her broken, wondering where God would take me next. And Raeann, oh Raeann – I can laugh and cry at just the mention of your name, the stories are too great … too deep to ever hope to express in a few words. But Sister, oh how my heart rejoices for you and my soul reaches to the Heavens to pray for your life. You mean more to me than could ever be hoped for in friendship – the Lord must have ordained it that I never have a biological sister, for the competition would be stiff for my affection!

And what of the Brothers I know to have in Christ? I can only hope to run into some of the greats of my life in Hannibal. Ben Craig, Cary Perrin, Drew Smith, TJ Collins, John Friesen … I am aware that many of us have moved on, but here's to the hope that you might be in town for the 4th of July, so that I can enjoy the occasion of running into you! Ben and Cary – we were IT in the old days, remember? Before it was ever "cool" (if, indeed, it ever was …) to be part of that big youth-group, it was just US. We'd pile up in Ben's Oldsmobile and drive around listening to Busta' Rhymes … ha ha! Then you'd come over to the house and I'd bake chocolate-chip cookies … every day. Drew … "wiggly worms" is still the baddest gang around, and uh – sorry about cussing you out in Spanish class when you said my surgery bandages made me look like a mummy! The thing is - they did. TJ, you were a neighbor and a friend! Perhaps it seemed we just hung out leisurely, but trust me when I tell you I watched you from afar, watched your transformation – your commitment to growing into a man that honored God. Many a times, I used your life as a measure for mine, recognizing that my years on your relationship with Christ mirrored nothing in comparison to your newfound passion. And John … you. are. hilarious. But you're much more than hilarious, you are thoughtful and thought-provoking, and you will be rewarded greatly on the day you meet our Savior, my friend. I get joy from seeing you and your beautiful bride in your photos!

The memories I have lived in Missouri are bitter-sweet, because I know they are gradually moving to the back of my mind. The reality that my brother is moving to Cincinnati affects me deeply on a number of levels. The obvious, of course, is that I am losing my little brother. He is, by no means, little. Though I have lived away from him now for over three years, there's something different about him picking up his things and moving to a place I have no connection to. So long as he was in the house we shared in Kansas City, so were my memories.

I count on that house, that city – my brother, to hold a past-identity. There's the "remember that time"s, and the "ever hear from so-and-so"s, and the, "man I miss that place"s. I can always visit and Michael and I hit up our favorite coffee houses and restaurants, and I sneak in a few conversations with friends. The truth is, it's time for me to begin thinking fondly of new memories; the time Raeann and I drove to Denver … and the infamous stop at a McDonald's in Kansas … my wedding … the moment I woke up to tell Keith my water had broken … the mismatch coaches we had in our living room on Penrose … the way Madelynn ran around our house with goggles on … Angela's boyfriend trying to figure out how to fit her futon into our new apartment. But, it's hard. New memories mean a new life. For three years I have lived in one of the most desired cities in America, have been married to "the nicest guy you've ever met", and I have a beautiful, beautiful daughter. However, there is something in me, still, that convinces me hard times eluded my life before I moved here. It's as though I try to escape new challenges by clinging to my "remember that time"s.

Truth is, when Michael moves, there won't be much reason to return to Missouri. My only compelling connection will have moved on, forcing me to realize that all Kansas City, or Hannibal, or Columbia holds for me are memories. And don't get me wrong, memories are powerful and meaningful things, but if that's all that Missouri holds for me … then I must learn to cling to the ones I have right here in front of me. It is, perhaps, a deeper layer of "growing up" and one I have been fearful to approach.

So, Kansas City – here I come! Columbia, I will make sure and stop by the Artisan for some great hummus and a cappuccino. Hannibal, I look forward to the "run-ins" you will provide. But then, and I say this with a heavy and yet, somehow, joyous heart – I must leave you. And it won't be leaving you like it has been before; it won't be the kind of leaving that shows regret on my face – like I'd stay if I could. It won't be the "goodbye" that holds onto the grudges that keep me tied to you. It won't be the "see ya' later" that begins to plan the next trip. Kansas City, Columbia, Hannibal … it will be the kind of leaving that means it's over; the chapter has been written, and it's time to write of the beautiful life that is standing in front of me and waiting … waiting to be truly lived.

Monday, June 28, 2010

M.R.S. gets buzzy!

I am very excited to announce that M.R.S. (Mothers Returning to School) has taken new shape and is moving forward, once again! B.E.E. (Beautiful.Educated.Empowered.) will be an exciting nonprofit that encourages ALL women to value and plan for higher education! To learn more, visit www.beautifuleducatedempowered.weebly.com ! This is a great opportunity for anyone interested in serving on a new board, as well! If you think you might be "right for the job", check out the link provided in the "B.E.E. Blog" on the official B.E.E. website mentioned above.

Next to you hear from me, I'll be back from NATIONALS! Looking forward to a Hannibal trip to see old friends! ;-)

JNACK

Friday, June 18, 2010

National News for the American Queen Pageant


NATIONAL PAGEANT CALLS HANNIBAL "HOME"






The American Queen Pageant, a national pageant system based in Atlanta, GA, has announced that Hannibal, MO will serve as its 2010 "host city". Honored as the "best pageant to compete in" by TFTJ magazine for two years in a row, the AQ Pageant offers women across America the chance to compete for Jr. Teen, Teen, Miss, Ms., and Mrs. titles. Titleholders are honored with the privilege of serving as spokespersons for the DASH (Domestic Abuse Stops Here) Foundation.




The 2010 national titleholders will be announced and crowned at the Hannibal Art Council's facilities, July 3rd. Sean Rolsen has been named official photographer for the event and Domino's Pizza and Sawyer's Creek have both been named as official sponsors; all will receive national tribute by the pageant. The American Queen titleholders are planning an exciting weekend, with queens from across the United States enjoying National Tom Sawyer Days. Please visit http://aqupdates.weebly.com/ for additional info, or to request recognition as a sponsor.

Saturday, June 5, 2010

Celebrating Life

This morning, I had the privilege of gathering with several hundred fellow-believers as we walked for something each of us supports: life. Though I make no apologies for my stance on abortion and the depravity I believe it reflects, I am acutely aware of the pain, anger, resentment, and passion the issue of unwanted pregnancy brings to those on both sides of the picket line. It seems irrational at times to presume strong pronouncements of the Truth I understand will somehow change hearts and minds. A better pronouncement, perhaps, is one of encouragement and acceptance. A message Alternatives certainly understands.


Even as we walked the mile and a half, my heart ached at the statistics Alternatives Pregnancy Center provided: by the age of 45, one in three women in America will have had an abortion. With every stranger we passed along the Platter River, I couldn't help but wonder, "Is it you?" How my soul cried out to the Savior that their emotions be guarded, lest they believe this was some sort of march against them and their decisions. I serve a mighty God, who within His strength and sovereignty makes time to weep for the loss of innocent lives at the hands of abortionists. But, make no mistake – He weeps also for the women who find themselves at unimaginable crossroads, engulfed in a society which denies them the strength they might have found within themselves. Rest assured - He holds them to no different standards than He does the rest of us bearing the burden of a fallen world.


What do we have if we cannot offer a message of hope, of comfort, and of the type of love only the followers of a Savior can claim? May I never persecute those who are waiting for me to take them in with open arms in the name of my Messiah. Forgive me when my soul strays, Father, to a place where I believe I am better than someone for the grace I have received. Remind me constantly that grace represents nothing more than what I am not.


Pray for our nation. Pray for our leaders. Pray for innocence. Pray for those who are hurting … on every side of the picket line.







A look at those lining up for life.









Sunday, May 23, 2010

An Addiction to No Substance

Donnie and Marie may be a little bit country, and a little bit rock and roll, but I'm a little bit white trash. Hey, throw me a parade and give me a holiday, because I am ready to celebrate my heritage. My daddy may have one of them fancy doctor degrees now, but honey- he grew up sans indoor plumbing and aunts with teeth. When his neighbors took down one of them jacked up cars … well, there goes the neighborhood. (I should mention he married well …)


When I was six, for those of you who haven't been bored with this story, I moved into an RV. Not out of desperation, but out of restoration, my parents decided to sell all of their possessions and follow a calling. I guess that's the thing about growing up without fancy social-norms; it's sorta' exhilarating. I can still remember one of our first cross-country stops: a lady at a church we were visiting asked me where I lived and I pointed at our house on four wheels sitting in the parking lot.


From there, it was an eight-year excursion to Trinidad, Colorado (or as my family fondly remembers it: "the inner-city with no outer-city"). Ah yes, the sex-change capitol of the world, subsidized lunches for all (the poverty rate was too high to make it worth the time to remove middle class students from the equation), and unusually high gang activity, according to a number of Colorado Bureau of Investigation statistics. As the not-so-famous Trinidad theme-song states, "It's a great place to plant your family tree …"


Next stop: Walsenburg. Did I say white trash? Because I am also a ghetto bitch. Thaaaaaaaat's right; tip this one for your hommies, folks; I got kicked out of school for fighting. The thing about gang-bangers is that you can either fight them or join them, and I did both. Good thing my dad was the chief of police where at least he could cut back on the number of police officers allowed to carry their gun to work while intoxicated and then get behind the wheel of a patrol car. Oh wait, he lost his job for trying to correct that problem (do NOT, and I repeat DO NOT mess with a cousin of a cousin's fiancé's cousin …).


After my mother's brief state of insanity, due to her newly appointed title (out of desperation to get her children out of the gang"ish" public schools): Homeschool Teacher, we were off to Hannibal, MO. Yee. Hah. Now, keep in mind, Hannibal was sort of a big deal. I mean a Wal-Mart AND a McDonald's. Living the high life … I was so incredibly impressed to have triple digits in my graduating class, and know classmates who were (get this!) ALSO planning on going to college! But, at the end of the day, I must confess that I dated more than one fellow who wore camo more often than not, and even our nice private-lane included one home with a few jacked-up cars in the lawn.


Make no mistake: my brief stints in Columbia, St. Louis, and Kansas City, Missouri could take the girl out of the white trash, but could never take the white trash out of the girl. No, no – that was saved for my ultimate move "up": I married a suburbanite. Score! CLASSY: I'm talking SUVs, mortgage debt, designer sunglasses, sundresses to the supermarket, and bleached teeth on gals that ain't even preparing for the country-fair pageant! DDDAAAAANNNNNGGG!


And now, before God and facebook, I make a confession: I will not, and cannot, ever fit in with my own newfound constituency: the suburban housewife. Just the other day, at Madelynn's dance class, I made an attempt. As the mothers sat in their Juicy velour, I realized my men's Adidas shorts, baggy husband's shirt, and greasy ponytail were, perhaps, making some people "uncomfortable". In my best effort to "act cool" I said, "Yea … didn't shower today".


Ouch. Okay, no problem Jen, when at first you don't succeed: try, try again. "I mean, because I was looking for a wagon today and the Wal-Mart by my house is kinda' ghetto, because like – our apartment is in between a good and bad neighborhood – so I had to drive all the way down to this Target, and … " Sigh. Maybe I can't blame them for turning their backs and getting right back to their discussion about cruise lines.


As it turns out, living with the cruise-line population has taught me something about white trash. White trash people have substance addictions. They are whole-heartedly committed to the fixes they get from honesty, and from family, and from an honest day's work. When they go to college (which they pay for themselves … because they are not raised with the expectation that it will be covered by their Mommies and Daddies), they have that sort of pride that doesn't come with knowing people expected something out of you, but the sort of pride that comes from people not expecting anything of you. They hug their mamas and their grand-pappies and their cousins not because it's important that everything look "alright", but because they know nothing's always "alright", and that's okay. They get substance. Even if they have no fluff to impress you with … they get substance. They're addicted to it, because in a world where money and image is foreign, substance matters.


Being addicted to no substance, I suppose, must give an incredible high. Man, a person must get an awful boost of adrenaline when they can look straight into the eyes of a friend, a co-worker, and sadly, their own family, and say, "Everything is GREAT. I am FINE. I look good, I sound good, I AM good … better than you, in fact". But damn, when I run out of substance, I know where to find more. But you - you house-broke, empty-inside, Botoxed, sad soul … when you're out, you're out. And I'm not sure what you'll have to show for your induced happiness.


Some reading this will nod their head and know they need to get off the computer. They've got children waiting to roll in dirt, uncles waiting to play poker, and a dog to walk; their addiction calls. Others will feel offended because they are suburbanites who live above the illusions. They are justified, because they are wonderful, wonderful, deep people, who don't deserve to be lumped into a stereotype. Still others will be offended for a whole other reason, a reason that cuts deep and fears the exposure of an addiction to no substance. And to you, I say, "Who cares what I think?" After all, I'm just poor white-trash.

Sinners in the Hands of a Healing God

Most generally, I come up with some darn good thinkin' when I am ticked off. Call it a talent (my conflict-management professor calls it a "concern"); I have tremendous mental capacity when someone says something that just gets my craw. Humbleness, poignancy, and reverence, however … those things leave me speechless. And so it is, in my helpless reflections and moments of nothingness … that God speaks.

Many of you realize my daughter spent a week in the hospital. For those of you who have never had this experience, the doctors ask that you hold your child still as tubes, measuring devises, and general pokey-things are used to check vitals and examine "the patient". The burden of holding a child who cannot possibly understand why you would allow this is a heavy one.

Brothers and Sisters, our God is always holding us. And no better than my not yet two year-old daughter can understand why I would allow a nurse to poke and prod her can we understand how God is holding us, all the while allowing human suffering and sadness. If parenting can offer even a glimpse into the vast heart of the Savior I serve, we can trust He takes no pleasure in our destitution, but knows our needs better than we do.

One morning as I stood solemn in front of Madelynn's monitors, I wondered how I would make it through another evening in the eerie lights of a hospital room. Hoping for encouragement, I logged onto facebook to read and reread the kind promises of prayer so many friends left on my wall. I updated my status, asking for prayer – that Madelynn's oxygen levels would continue to rise. I checked a few other items on facebook, and then logged off.

Madelynn's numbers were up by the time I set down the laptop. My first reaction was, "I feel kinda' silly telling everyone on facebook she still needed prayer, when she turns out to be doing well!" And then it hit me. I logged back on … Brad Strait, "I am [praying] right now", Kara Dameron, "You are in our prayers", Dana Capranica Gurlue, "Praying she goes home today" … the list goes on. Do you have any of those friends who promise to pray for you, just to be polite – but never do? I don't.

I am not sure how it is that the God of the universe (who designed the intricacies of the very little lungs we were praying for) works in such a way that the prayers of such a feeble and fallen people matter, but He does. Oh, how He does. And they matter beyond our intentions. If the Son of God was able to multiply two loaves of bread and a few fish to feed tens of thousands of people, how we must rejoice as we think of His power to multiply the small gift of our prayers!

Friends, your prayers did not simply aid in the healing of my precious daughter, but they shook me, they stirred me. Those prayers brought tears to Keith's face, and gave us perseverance to continue our own prayers. Those prayers renewed my desire to tell those that I come into contact with that they need not be afraid; they are sons and daughters of the one true King. Those prayers sent me crying on my knees, pleading with the Messiah to not allow me to forget that there are mothers all around in the world, and in my neighborhood, who cannot take their little girls to the hospital. Father, make it a daily burden, a constant thorn in my side – that I would reach out, pray for, and assist in the healing of those without.

I am reminded of a quote from Mother Theresa, "It is poverty to decide that a child must die so that you may live as you wish". The quote is in reference to abortion, but as I ponder the millions of children in desperate need of healing – I question whether or not my daily decision to purchase "things", instead of giving all I have away, is not a decision that a child must die so that I may live as I wish.

Great Healer, may you bestow your generous mercy on those who are ill, those who are starving, those who have nothing. But Lord, may you not forget to heal others of us from our spiritual blindness, our desires to serve ourselves, our desires to collect luxuries as others gasp for necessities. And may we praise You, because we are healed daily, saved daily, touched by grace daily. To You alone be the Glory.


Paradigm Lost

There was a kid in my sixth-grade class, named Mike, who was nice, but not necessarily gifted. He is most famous for his misreading of the word, "Virginia," as "vagina." We did not fully know the meaning of this word, but we recognized it was funny to think of it as the home of the first American settlers.

The less famous Mike-story, but one I remember as clearly, is that of the tremendous time he tacked onto any peer-grading session.

Teacher: The answer to number seven is violet.
Mike: Okay, but Jenny wrote, "a shade of purple." Do I mark that wrong?
Teacher: No, Mike. That's fine.

Teacher: The answer to number eight is bovine.
Mike: Oooo, Jenny wrote, "cow" . . . wrong?
Teacher: No, Mike. That's acceptable.

Teacher: The answer to number nine is sphere.
Mike: Excuse me, Jenny has here, "ball."
Teacher: -Sigh- Yes, Mike. Ball is okay.

As I heard a speaker once explain, Mike was confusing, "blue rules" for, "red rules." (During the speaker's presentation, he asked us to make a list of rules that don't always matter .. several employees raised their hand to ask exactly how many examples needed to be included on this list . . . )

In Mike's scenario, the "red rule" would be that if a student answers oppositely or irrelevantly, it needs to be corrected. This rule cannot be broken; it would interrupt the learning process. The "blue rule" would be that the answer must be verbatim to the grading key. This rule can be broken, and no one dies.

Mike is not alone in his non-essential rule-breaking paralysis. I once had a part-time job at Kohl's, and as I was counting change one evening, a supervisor exclaimed, "Oh no! Not like that! You have to put all the pennies on the counter, and then slide then off one by one, see?" Thank God she told me.

Besides the occasional annoyance, I accept blue-rule enforcers as part of life. What concerns me beyond that simple annoyance, however, is the reality that much of Evangelical Christianity has been reduced to blue-rule enforcement. In a world dark and dying, a world that cries out for food, shelter, and hope . . . have we as Evangelicals become little more than hall monitors?

This concern came to its head in my life some time ago. My husband and I interviewed for a ministry program called, "Apartment Life," a supposedly non-denominational Christian organization that places couples in apartment buildings to reach out to people through kindness and relationships.

We were rejected. Our interviewer's "prayerful consideration" took the entire drive home. Call it a hunch, but I believe this had something to do with Keith's "wrong" answer about his salvation experience. A Catholic throughout his upbringing, Keith told her about his confirmation and the personal commitment to Christ that grew out of that tradition.

Perhaps the greatest insult was that our interviewer waited until Keith had left the room to express to me her concerns about the legitimacy of Keith's salvation.

I cannot claim to know this woman's heart, and believe with sincerity she carries with her the purest of intentions. But, somewhere in the book of Evangelical Blue Rules is a chapter on "Accepted Forms of Expressing One's Faith." In case you're curious, the guidelines state clearly that salvation stories must fit the following format: "I accepted Jesus Christ as my Lord and Savior on fill in the date at fill in the name of the Baptist church." See Chapter Seventeen for acceptable denominational backgrounds.

Teacher: The answer to number ten is that we become Christians by believing that Jesus is, "The Way, the Truth, and the Life."
Mike: Okay, but what if she said, "I believe that Jesus is the Way, the Truth, and the Life . . . ," but she also put that she was taught that at a Catholic church?

Not for the purposes of boasting, for the purposes of defending what I know to be true, let me tell you about the man I married - one who loves the Lord with all his heart, with all his mind, and with all his soul.

Keith is a man who will open three or four books after church, if he has to, out of a desire to fully understand and take a stance on something the pastor mentions. He is a man who rejoices in the comfort of like-minded authors who strengthen his journey in Christ.

He is a man who once risked his own life to defend an acquaintance who was being beaten in an alleyway. He once scolded an NFL player, in public, for not treating a woman kindly.

Keith is a man who works fifty hours a week so that I can stay home with Madelynn, and never complains when he has to do the dishes on top of all that. He is a man who prays aloud every night that his daughter might grow to one day serve the Lord, and that he may continue to grow closer to me, through Christ.

How the angels must have mourned at the loss of an opportunity to place such a servant in a position of ministerial leadership. But I know they were comforted, as I was too, when God reminded them that he has placed Keith exactly where he needs to be for such a time as this.

In the words of the great St. Augustine (who, by the way, would probably get a rejection email from Apartment Life), "In essentials, unity; in non-essentials, liberty; in all things, charity."

Perhaps St. Agustine knew a few blue-rule enforcers...

Busy with Blessings

It's been awhile, and for good cause! I am richly blessed with activities that keep me grounded, keep me focused, and keep me close to people I care deeply about. What blessings I have enjoyed the last several weeks! God is an awesome God, and I am glad to be part of His plan.

My adventures have included: a trip to Kansas City to see the one and only Michael Shults play his senior recitals, an amazing weekend with the Miss Teen Colorado-World family, and one heck of a show at Mrs. Colorado America! Did I mention I snuck some coffee time with pageant pals in there? Please enjoy some photos from these events. I am also including some photos of the the amazing gals I continue to get to work with as a pageant coach.

Additionally, while I usually use this forum as an "update" for the life and times of my life as a titleholder, I confess that I cheat on blogger and post some thoughts on facebook quite a bit! A recent post on facebook (I keep my "notes" locked for the eyes of friends only ... who hopefully can read my words with an understanding of my intentions as well ...) mentioned my defense of the amazing women I know in pageantry. I hope my photos tell the same story when you see how much fun we have together.


I have also decided to share some of my other "work" from facebook, here on my more public forum. Enjoy, disagree, or just learn a little bit more about me!








Kansas City with my brother!








Shopping with Miss Stacie!











The GREAT Naomi!!!










Tori and me at Miss Teen Colorado World!






Great friends, Jennifer and Joss, Mrs. CO America prelims!











At Mrs. CO America finals night with Makayla and Brenda!













Coffee with Joss, Carmela, and the Michelles!













Tuesday, April 6, 2010

Some Meat to go with the Potatoes

The Hindsight of Others: Our Plan for Oversight

By: Jennifer Nackerud

Founder/Acting Director M.R.S.

As M.R.S. (Mothers Returning to School) reaches the next curve on this incredible road to formal incorporation as a nonprofit organization, we have many things to be thankful for: a solid mission and vision, over 100 supporters on the web, inspiring feedback from mothers across Colorado, and an appreciated partnership with Colorado Christian University. That said, there is a lot of work to do, and now more than ever, M.R.S. looks to you for your prayers, support, and encouragement.


 

One major objective in the upcoming months is the establishment of a governing board. As we begin the interviewing and selection process for board members, I ask that we not get caught up in simply "filling slots", but focus on a true understanding of what governance is to this organization, and how that will look as we begin relying on a board to implement policy, seek funding, and hire an executive director.


 

This focus will certainly require ample consideration of the current practices of other faith-based nonprofits. In the next few weeks, I will be providing a series of interviews from various nonprofits; may we be open to seeing ourselves in others' areas of improvement, and learning from their strengths.


 

The first interview to be included in this series was an easy and significant one for me. Easy because it was my father, significant because I have a genuine respect for his leadership capacities, and know he is nothing if not an honest, transparent communicator. My father, Dr. Shults, served as the pastor of Southside Baptist Church, in Hannibal, Missouri, for several years. To allow for an easier comparison of a church body to other nonprofit organizations, let me establish that in this particular congregation … the "deacons" function as the "board", the "pastor" functions as an "executive director", the "chairman of deacons" functions as the "board chair", and members of the church, as well as the larger community of Hannibal, serve as "owners" (for whom the mission of the church is carried out).


 

When asked to describe the organizational leadership capacities of the deacon body in relation to his own position, Dr. Shults described both his understanding of the traditional ways these roles are interpreted within Baptist congregations, as well as his own experience. He clarified that all authority is by culture, and not mandate. His opinion is that personalities often dictate whether the deacons or the pastor has more "control" over the daily functions and decisions of the church body. His personal experience, at Southside Baptist, was that the deacon body was deferential, viewing Dr. Shults as "the expert".


 

As he proceeded to describe this relationship in terms of functionality, the issue of "real" governance verses "visible" governance began to emerge, "What happens [with a differential deacon body] is that the bigger the decision, particularly with money, the more nervous they'd get. Rather than coming right out and disagreeing with something, they'd agree and then sabotage the idea". Dr. Shults gave the example of one deacon who would vote to accomplish a task, and then refuse to carry it out, or appoint anyone else to. Despite these frustrations, Shults did mention the chairman of deacons always considered it his duty to be supportive of the pastoral role, and was always supportive personally, and in the matter of voting. The chairman was an effective liaison, managing to be an ally to both Shults and the deacon body.


 

In addition to his discussion of relationship with the deacon body, the more formal points included the fact that deacon meetings were held to "Robert's Rules of Order", the established by-laws of the church body were not reviewed or updated during Dr. Shults' tenure, and deacons served on a yearly rotation (though because of possible re-election, there was very little movement).

Looking back, Shults would not have recommended any changes. The reason is simple: he believes any changes are incremental and must come from within the deacon body. He pointed out that a pastor's time at a church is always shorter than a deacon's, and many times the deacons' attitudes are, "I was here before the pastor was, and I will be here after he leaves".

As the founder of an infant organization, and student in a nonprofit management program that reminds me daily of my inadequacies, I certainly claim no ability to suggest the type of change that would be necessary for Southside Baptist Church to work in its ideal capacity; one where the deacon body and the pastor work together with total trust and a focus on the specific established mission of the congregation. What I do have the audacity to attempt, however, is to glean from the interview with my father and make a few suggestions for M.R.S. as we head towards establishing a board.


 

Suggestion #1: As we seek board members, we must begin the creation of a culture which focuses on the Truth. Did Southside forget its purpose, its mission? I don't believe so. I happened to have been privileged enough to work on staff at that church for a summer, as a youth minister. The deacons are kind people (and let me be clear that my father would say the same of them) who know whole-heartedly the purpose of their church, because it mirrors the purpose of their lives, as people of faith.


 

Perhaps it is precisely the opposite that is true: they cannot forget their purpose – it has been taught to many of them since childhood (some in the very same pew they sit in today!), inscribed in their Bibles, it's part of their signature when they send a birthday card ("God Bless you …"), and they pray their purpose be fulfilled each time they begin their meetings. And so it is that we find habits, rituals, formats, and traditions removing Truth from purpose. A supplement to this is a beautiful statement by Aideen McGinley, "Together, we need to lift our sights and create the image of a transformed society. We need to identify the perpetual horizon".


 

My fellow supporters of M.R.S.: may we never be so focused on ensuring that we are " … equipping mothers with practical tools for pursing education" that we forget the Truth that there are single mothers crying themselves to sleep this evening because they have no way of earning enough to pay next month's rent. May we never forget the Truth that the mothers who smile at us this Sunday morning at church might be dying inside, lost with no feeling of purpose or direction after having children. Lest we forget that education can Truly change lives, and the spirits of many are waiting on us to deliver this hope. Purpose must never become practical, it must always be passionate.


 

Action: In addition to keeping the mission statement present and visible in all of our recruitment activities (as well as board functions in the future), a great way to remember the Truth behind our mission is to provide a monthly newsletter to board members that includes success stories about mothers who have returned to school. What an awesome and inspiring way to start thinking about how we can impact our world!


 

Suggestion #2: Keep it real. I am sure there will be times I regret saying this, but if you don't like something I say, respect me enough to tell me. Obviously, normal discretion applies (if you don't like the luncheon menu I've chosen … who cares?), but if board members can't be authentic with each other, with me, and with an ED – how can we expect our message to the community to be authentic? Sooner or later, conflict reveals itself. I for one would rather find out that you think my idea is way off today than find out you thought my idea six months ago was way off and consequently, you're sabotaging current projects. Nancy Axelrod, author of Culture of Inquiry: Healthy Debate in the Boardroom, states,

    A healthy culture of inquiry promotes thoughtful decision making, even when the     decisions are tough ones. When dialogue, candor and dissent are all part of the group dynamics, board     members master the skills of listening, dissecting the issues, and responding thoughtfully, truthfully, and in the best interests of the organization     (http://www.boardsource.org/Spotlight.asp?ID=116.371).


 

Action: Assigning board members "mini" research projects about other organizations is a great way to get everyone involved with confronting conflict in a healthy (perhaps more comfortable) way. By allowing board members to start meetings with short presentations on the way in which other boards do their work, M.R.S. board members have non-accusatory opportunities to make suggestions and point out practices and concepts they disagree with, etc.


 

Suggestion #3: We will all be frantically sifting through our facebook friends lists, Yahoo! contact lists, cell phone numbers, and church directories in the upcoming months to look for connections that can bring us the best possible board-member options. The light-bulbs will be "ding-dinging" as we make the connections … "Ah! My best friend's brother's cousin's boss is a professor; he'd be perfect for this!" Here is my warning: do not believe yourself to be recruiting experts, but rather people with expertise. The Southside example teaches us that not only did the deacons hold resentment towards the pastor they had informally given decision-making "power" to, but it placed the pastor in a no-win scenario; he had a deacon body waiting on his decisions, only to undermine them. A healthier relationship would have included distinct job descriptions, and a perspective of partnership.


 

Action: We must create uniformity in our recruitment practices, to include information from the beginning on what the board will be asked to accomplish as a team, and in partnership with an executive director. A potential board member must never assume he or she is there to represent a particular viewpoint, but rather to use a particular viewpoint to represent mothers who are seeking continued education. In fact, Joyaux Associates (ww.simonejoyaux.com), includes this in suggested performance expectations, to be clearly communicated to candidates, "As appropriate, use personal and professional contacts and expertise for the benefit of [the organization]."


 

By following these suggestions and action plans, will M.R.S. create the utopia of board governance? No. However, as an organization we have been tremendously blessed with the opportunity to think critically and meaningfully about the approaches we are preparing to implement in a desire to, "… have a powerful, positive effect on communities and families, by strengthening the academic capacities of the mothers who shape them". So, ask me questions, encourage me to ask you questions, and get perspective from a variety of people; the mothers we serve will thank you. As always, I praise God for your input, your ideas, your intelligence, and your inner-strength; blessings to you and yours, and thank you for being on this journey with me.


 


 


 

    

School Time!

When I accepted the Mrs. Colorado American Queen title, I did so with the anticipation of promotional opportunities for the M.R.S. ministry. I will continue to enjoy appearances and fun activities throughout my reign, but need to be consistently reminded of the importance of using this time to "jump start" a more formal movement to assist the mothers in Colorado who are pursuing, or thinking about pursuing, their education.


In case I have not made it clear: I AM a MOTHER RETURNING TO SCHOOL! I have included a photo of myself, classmates, and professor, in my latest course: Financial Management of Nonprofits. For those who don't know me well, I ain't a math pro ... but I am surviving! As I hope to consistently emphasize through my ministry - education affects and betters everyday LIFE! This class is not only going to make M.R.S. stronger; it will make ME stronger.


You'll be seeing posts about the progress of M.R.S. in the upcoming months' blogs. GET INVOLVED, and if you're a mama - let me know how you can be served to make additional education a reality in your life.

MUCH LOVE

Saturday, April 3, 2010

Photo Shoot, Oo La La!







Today (April 3rd), I got to be a make-up artist at the Jr Teen Colorado World and Teen Colorado World photo shoot! For those who don't know, I have a background as a make-up artist with Clinique cosmetics, and in August - officially became part of the MARY KAY family! I LOVE it, and love being able to use my background and experience, but be able to control my own schedule and income. I am so fortunate to work with the fabulous Toby Greer, Director Extraordinaire. She was part of the shoot this morning, too (see above). Thank you, Toby!
The rest of my day was spent doing Easter with my in-laws and my little girl! SO fun! I am thankful to serve a Risen Saviour, and look forward to sharing the Good News with friends and family the rest of this weekend. Much Love! ;-)

Sunday, March 28, 2010

Proud Coach











This weekend was truly spectacular. On the 27th, April Elzinga, director of the Miss Jr Teen Colorado World and Miss Teen Colorado World pageants (http://www.missteencolorado-world.us/), flew in from Utah to be part of a workshop we worked on for the conestants of her pageants - and anyone else who wanted to join us! We chatted and shared pointers for competition, and even strutted ourselves down a makeshift runway! Fun! And, next week I get to be part of this pagaent's photo shoot, yay!









Then, in the evening, I traveled with Michelle Field to attend the Colorado and Wyomming Galaxy pageants. My client, Maria Henderson - took 1st RU to Miss Colorado Galaxy, and my client, Isabella Gibbs, became the new Little Miss Colorado Galaxy! Way to go, ladies!







Sunday, March 21, 2010

Great Weekend!







On the 19th, I had a blast getting one of my coaching clients ready for Miss Colorado Galaxy. Maria Henderson is one of my favorite gals, and I am so blessed to call her "mine"! :-) She is going to be stellar, and I am so proud of her! She and I had the help of another client, Kara Gramlich - who is working on a modeling career! Kara was also awesome, but managed to leave before I remembered to take photos! I'll get a photo of us yet, Kara!



On the 20th, I met with a new client, little Miss Isabella Gibbs. She is a doll and she and her mama had a blast with me! There's not much I can add to an already cute kid, let me tell ya'! But, I can tell this little one is a hard worker and I am excited to see the things to come. Isabella will also be at the Galaxy pageant next weekend! You go, girlie!



Today (the 21st), I had the BEST time modeling for My Big Day Planner. I was the "bridesmaid" for the event, and had a blast! My make-up was done by Tiffany of Blush Artistry and Company, and she is AMAZING (http://www.blushartistryandcompany.com/)! My hair was done by Misha of Salon Misha - love him (http://www.salonmisha.com/)!

The professional photos of the event will be posted as soon as I get them! Speaking of photos, I can't wait to start posting blogs about my great sponsors! Be looking forward to This is Real Photography, up first ...

Much Love!
JNACK

Wednesday, March 17, 2010

March Activities



I am finding the difficult thing about keeping a blog is not really finding time or energy to write, but rather deciding what it is I will write about. I hope to make this blog a mixture of event and appearance updates, but also some time for reflection. So, for today - here is a little bit of both ...







On the 12th, I drove to The Little White Dress bridal boutique, for a fitting. I am so excited that I will be part of a fashion show on the 21st - for My Big Day Wedding Planner! Cate has an amazing shop, it's beautiful! I can't wait to update all of you on that event!




On the 13th, I was privileged to judge a "double header" pageant, which included a CO American Coed prelim, as well as "Butterfly Beauties", produced by Valerie Sweely, who does a number of fun-themed pageants throughout the year. I can remember my younger pageantry days, and hearing judges say, "It was such a tough decision!". Now I know they were not just being polite; my goodness, what a great group of gals! It was so fun, and I got to hang out with Mrs. Colorado International 2009, Michelle Field .... as well as visit with the Colorado American Coed Royalty, including Macayla Fletcher, who I've had the honor of coaching this past year.


If you are interested in learning more about the Colorado Coed program, please visit http://colorado.gocoed.com/ - I know the director personally, and can assure you that this is a great system for starting your daughters in (or yourself - if you're not a mama!).



As I face the privilege of finding ways to work all of the wonderful community involvement into an already busy schedule, I have also committed to enjoying "media free" days. Yep! GASP - I am devoting one day a week to NO COMPUTERS, NO DVDs, NO CELL PHONE (okay, except calls from my hubby and my parents ... and my brother ... but that's just a given ;) ). I am amazed at how this not only frees up my time, but it frees my mind and my stress levels. I encourage you all to try an "unplugged" day - and let me know how it goes!



MUCH LOVE -

JNACK
PS - I need a new camera - sorry for the blurry pictures. You are welcome to donate to my new camera fund ... lol

Tuesday, February 16, 2010

Proudly Serving Colorado and the American Queen Pageant System







I am so very excited to announce that I will be serving as 2010's Mrs. Colorado American Queen. Here is a little information about how I came to this position, and what will be coming in the next few months ...
Several years ago, I was able to meet Connie Wallace, a woman I continue to respect and consider a mentor. Connie and her daughters had competed in numerous pageants, and felt like they were called to start a better system, one where contestants were truly treated as equals, and encouraged to have a good time. They started the American Queen system, and created a nonprofit organization for which titleholders would be spokespersons (DASH - Domestic Abuse Stops Here).
I was terribly impressed with this pageant and volunteered to help bring a state competition to Colorado. With her husband's health needing attention, and career changes in her future, Connie made the executive decision to hold off on a Colorado pageant. That very summer, announcements were made that Connie would be handing the pageant over to Sunjia Burks.
Within the last year, I have returned to pageantry, and also began promoting and establishing my own nonprofit, M.R.S. (Mothers Returning to School). So, I contacted Sunjia about stepping down as a volunteer, and applying for the title of Mrs. Colorado AQ. She obliged, and I was notified that my application had been accepted - and I was being appointed this title. How exciting!
The year ahead includes lots of community service projects, speaking engagements, and M.R.S. events. Additionally, I will be competing this summer at the national American Queen pageant, to be held in Florida.
Hold on, friends, it's going to be a fun year! :)
Jennifer Nackerud